Successfully removing oneself from an abusive situation is much like overcoming addiction; when a person desires sobriety, he cannot associate with drug addicts or people who abuse drugs. Your husband has left you and abandon you and failed his God given role as your husband. In Greek Mythology, Narcissus was known for his beauty and a fixation on himself and his outer appearance. You husbands in the same way, live with your wives in an understanding way, as with someone weaker, since she is a woman; and show her honor as a fellow heir of the grace of life, so that your prayers will not be hindered. 1. Even the Old Testament of the Bible clearly contains tragic stories of sexual abuse, incest, and rape. How should a person's mate be treated? And if I have prophetic powers, and understand all mysteries and all knowledge, and if I have all faith, so as to remove mountains, but have not love, I am nothing. The Biblical book of Isaiah 61:1,3 clearly describes the promise of transformation and healing through our Redeemer, Jesus Christ. God has called you to peace.1 Corinthians 6:19-20 Or do you not know that your body is a temple of the Holy Spirit within you, whom you have from God? Just as Jesus loved us in our sinful state, we can love and honor an abusive parent as well as a friend, sibling, neighbor, co-worker, or spouse. What Does The Bible Say About Worshiping Together? OpenBible.info In addition to adultery, sexual immorality, and abandonment, emotional and physical abuse is mentioned in the Old Testament and repeated in the New Testament, but we've never seen it because we aren't looking for it. document.getElementById( "ak_js_1" ).setAttribute( "value", ( new Date() ).getTime() ); 1 Billy Graham Parkway, Charlotte, NC 28201 L Read also Ephesians 4:29-32. The Scriptures speak strongly against verbal abuse.Proverbs 22:24 says, "Do not associate with a man given to anger; or go with a hot . Yet your desire will be for your husband. Ephesians 5:21-24 says, Submit to one another out of reverence for Christ. What does God feel about abuse? In reality, Scripture shows us God's permission for divorce in several places. And do not proceed in the way of evil men. You covet and cannot obtain, so you fight and quarrel. This type of abuse can be physical, sexual, or emotional in nature. Whoever says I know him but does not keep his commandments is a liar, and the truth is not in him, but whoever keeps his word, in him truly the love of God is perfected. It is easy in a situation like yours to do just that. Contact me: openbibleinfo (at) gmail.com. Amazingly, the Lord Jesus cares for His followers and has laid down His life to demonstrate His love for them (1 Peter 5:7). The Bible says much about Abusive Relationships. If not, make that commitment now, and learn the joy of having Christ at the center of your marriage. Do not repay evil for evil or reviling for reviling, but on the contrary, bless, for to this you were called, that you may obtain a blessing. The Bible clearly portrays abuse as sin because Christ has revealed Himself as Love and has commanded all His followers to love one another (John 13:34). so let the wives be to their own husbands in every thing." Put away from you crooked speech, and put devious talk far from you. Be sure you do not act toward your husband in the way he acts toward you. Whenever we need him, he's just a call away. It is like adding more fire to the flame. These traits will be more like a millstone around the neck, dragging the child towards the same sinful patterns. Truthfully speaking, growing up in an abusive home can leave scars many spend a lifetime trying to overcome. The Bible gives only one reason by which a divorce is permitted. If he listens to you, you have gained your brother. However, this is a simplistic and often misleading view of abuse. That is, she was locked in the silence, violation, shame, and trauma of the abuse she suffered at the hands of her own half-brother. It does not insist on its own way; Ephesians 4:26 Be angry and do not sin; do not let the sun go down on your anger,Proverbs 10:6 Blessings are on the head of the righteous, but the mouth of the wicked conceals violence.John 13:34 A new commandment I give to you, that you love one another: just as I have loved you, you also are to love one another., Malachi 2:16-17 For the man who does not love his wife but divorces her, says theLord, the God of Israel, covers his garment with violence, says theLordof hosts. For anyone who curses his father or his mother shall surely be put to death; he has cursed his father or his mother; his blood is upon him. Thus, by the grace of God, be willing to forgive and let go of the pains of the past as you hold strong to Christ. For this is how the holy women who hoped in God used to adorn themselves, by submitting to their own husbands, , Psalm 103:6 TheLordworks righteousness and justice for all who are oppressed.Exodus 22:22 You shall not mistreat any widow or fatherless child.Romans 12:19 Beloved, never avenge yourselves, but leave it to the wrath of God, for it is written, Vengeance is mine, I will repay, says the Lord.1 Peter 5:7 Casting all your anxieties on him, because he cares for you.Hebrews 13:3 Remember those who are in prison, as though in prison with them, and those who are mistreated, since you also are in the body., Ephesians 4:29 Let no corrupting talk come out of your mouths, but only such as is good for building up, as fits the occasion, that it may give grace to those who hear.1 Thessalonians 5:11 Therefore encourage one another and build one another up, just as you are doing.Zephaniah 1:9 On that day I will punish everyone who leaps over the threshold, and those who fill their masters house with violence and fraud.Psalm 72:14 From oppression and violence he redeems their life, and precious is their blood in his sight., Ephesians 5:28-29 In the same way husbands should love their wives as their own bodies. We have detected that you are using extensions to block ads. -Paige Patterson. For they cannot sleep unless they do evil; And they are robbed of sleep unless they make someone stumble. While it is good for the abuser to take responsibility and make amends to those he hurt, it is Jesus who grants peace to those in pain. It would be better for him if a millstone were hung around his neck and he were cast into the sea than that he should cause one of these little ones to sin. The mouth of the righteous is a fountain of life,But the mouth of the wicked conceals violence. This mystery is great; but I am speaking with reference to Christ and the church. For you have died, and your life is hidden with Christ in God. First, he says love is patient and kind ( 1 Corinthians 13:4 ). In 1 Corinthians 13, the Lord God Almighty tells us what love is as well as what it is not. A Christian woman should not feel that the only help available to her is the police. I warn you, as I warned you before, that those who do such things will not inherit the kingdom of God.Ephesians 6:4 Fathers, do not provoke your children to anger, but bring them up in the discipline and instruction of the Lord.Colossians 3:19 Husbands, love your wives, and do not be harsh with them., Colossians 3:21 Fathers, do not provoke your children, lest they become discouraged.1 Corinthians 7:15 But if the unbelieving partner separates, let it be so. Be sure you do not act toward your husband in the way he acts toward you. God is faithful, and he will not let you be tempted beyond your ability, but with the temptation he will also provide the way of escape, that you may be able to endure it., Matthew 5:21-22 You have heard that it was said to those of old, You shall not murder; and whoever murders will be liable to judgment. But I say to you that everyone who is angry with his brother will be liable to judgment; whoever insults his brother will be liable to the council; and whoever says, You fool! will be liable to the hell of fire.Galatians 6:1 Brothers, if anyone is caught in any transgression, you who are spiritual should restore him in a spirit of gentleness. Note that anyone can be an abuser, regardless of age, ethnicity, gender, and/or background. He made it known by sending his angel to his servant John, who bore witness to the word of God and to the testimony of Jesus Christ, even to all that he saw. God judges those outside. and she leaves his house and goes and becomes another mans wife. "I have to yell, because you're so unreasonable and . And we urge you, brothers, admonish the idle, encourage the fainthearted, help the weak, be patient with them all. Beverly Engel, The Emotionally Abusive Relationship How to Stop Being Abused and How to Stop Abusing, New Jersey: John Wiley & Sons, Inc., 2002, pp. Finally, all of you, have unity of mind, sympathy, brotherly love, a tender heart, and a humble mind. Narcissism is defined as having an excessive interest in or admiration for oneself and in one's physical appearance. And at noon Elijah mocked them, saying, Cry aloud, for he is a god. People will be lovers of themselves, lovers of money, boastful, proud, abusive, disobedient . The Bible doesn't use the label "emotional abuse," but it does prohibit it. All Scripture quotations, unless otherwise indicated, are taken from The Holy Bible, English Standard Version. James 1:19 - Wherefore, my beloved brethren, let every man be swift to hear, slow to speak, slow to wrath: 1 Corinthians 7:15 - But if the unbelieving . It is not what goes into the mouth that defiles a person, but what comes out of the mouth; this defiles a person.. The Bible says abusive husbands are in sin. They want you to believe that you bring verbal abuse on yourself. In these verses, Paul defines what true love looks like in a relationship. Permissions Older women likewise are to be reverent in their behavior, not malicious gossips nor enslaved to much wine, teaching what is good, so that they may encourage the young women to love their husbands, to love their children, to be sensible, pure, workers at home, kind, being subject to their own husbands, so that the word of God will not be dishonored. Whoever rebukes a man will afterward find more favor than he who flatters with his tongue. Keep in mind, however, that this often does not solve the problem. Copyright 2001 by Crossway Bibles, a publishing ministry of Good News Publishers. Yes! Group 1 - What Does The Bible Say About Verbally Abusive Husbands. Emotional abuse is neither patient . Do not be conformed to this world, but be transformed by the renewal of your mind, that by testing you may discern what is the will of God, what is good and acceptable and perfect. God NEVER says that He hates the person who chooses to get divorced. It is distressing to be on the receiving end of very cutting and abrupt comments that wound ones spirit. or is there a deeper problem?" Sin is hard to leave, in part, because we like it. Again I say to you, if two of you agree on earth about anything they ask, it will be done for them by my Father in heaven. Answer: Before tackling your question on spousal abuse in the Bible, something must be said about divorce. A growing self-doubt. For the unbelieving husband is made holy because of his wife, and the unbelieving wife is made holy because of her husband. And when she pressed him hard with her words day after day, and urged him, his soul was vexed to death. And the one who loves violence His soul hates. And such were some of you. Here are five practical steps to center your perspective in truth when your husband feels like the enemy: 1. Note that abuse can be physical as well as emotional. H As for a person who stirs up division, after warning him once and then twice, have nothing more to do with him. Wives, be subject to your husbands, as is fitting in the Lord. Did he not make them one, with a portion of the Spirit in their union? At its pronunciation, many people are more likely to perceive anger or some form of physical violence involved. As Christians, we should not replicate the abuse that we were victims of to others. Local: 704-401-2432 In such cases the brother or sister is not enslaved. Remember that the Bible calls on us to love not only our friends but even those who hurt us. Affirm and support your loved one in your conversations. Forgiveness is not saying the offense was okay. The Bible strongly condemns taking advantage of or abusing others (Exodus 22:22;Isaiah 10:2;1 Thessalonians 4:6). My husband could see the difference, and the change only made his behavior worse. To the choirmaster: according to Muth-labben. For people will be lovers of self, lovers of money, proud, arrogant, abusive, disobedient to their parents, ungrateful, unholy, heartless, unappeasable, slanderous, without self-control, brutal, not loving good, treacherous, reckless, swollen with conceit, lovers of pleasure rather than lovers of God, having the appearance of godliness, but denying its power. Psalm 30:2: "Lord my God, I called to you for help, and you healed me.". It is easy in a situation like yours to do just that. O And if he refuses to listen even to the church, let him be to you as a Gentile and a tax collector. Read 1 Corinthians, chapter 13, and Ephesians 5:28-29. Jesus Christ will most assuredly comfort, vindicate, and heal those in pains and sufferings caused by any form of abuse (John 10:11-15). R Amazingly, Scripture continuous to talk about the brothers, the father, and the consequences for them. This has the effect of diverting the conversation and putting the other partner on the defensive. But if he does not listen, take one or two others along with you, that every charge may be established by the evidence of two or three witnesses . But as the church is subject to Christ, so also the wives ought to be to their husbands in everything. Your adversary the devil prowls around like a roaring lion, seeking someone to devour. Bible verses related to Abusive Husbands from the King James Version (KJV) by Relevance. Little children, let us not love in word or talk but in deed and in truth. 1 Corinthians 15:33 - Be not deceived: evil communications corrupt good manners. Likewise, domestic violence can as well be linked to child abuse. My brethren, these things ought not so to be. You have heard that it was said to those of old, You shall not murder; and whoever murders will be liable to judgment. But I say to you that everyone who is angry with his brother will be liable to judgment; whoever insults his brother will be liable to the council; and whoever says, You fool! will be liable to the hell of fire. He is the propitiation for our sins, and not for ours only but also for the sins of the whole world. It is important to understand that God does not condone abuse in any of its forms. Another form of verbal abuse is judging and criticizing. Verses about How to Be a Godly Wife. This mystery is great; but I am speaking with reference to Christ and the church. Wives, be subject to your own husbands, as to the Lord. Even emotion and verbal abuse God will not excuse. The Bible calls these abusive behaviors, rage or fits of anger, malice, evil speaking, deceit, envy, lying, hypocrisy, and abrasive speech (Col. 3:8; Eph. If he refuses to listen to them, tell it to the church. Love is patient and kind; love does not envy or boast; it is not arrogant. , Proverbs 13:24 Whoever spares the rod hates his son, but he who loves him is diligent to discipline him.Psalm 10:17-18 OLord, you hear the desire of the afflicted; you will strengthen their heart; you will incline your ear to do justice to the fatherless and the oppressed, so that man who is of the earth may strike terror no more., Titus 2:4 And so train the young women to love their husbands and children,1 Samuel 31:4 Then Saul said to his armor-bearer, Draw your sword, and thrust me through with it, lest these uncircumcised come and thrust me through, and mistreat me. But his armor-bearer would not, for he feared greatly. Finally, brothers, whatever is true, whatever is honorable, whatever is just, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is commendable, if there is any excellence, if there is anything worthy of praise, think about these things. How to Overcome Anxiety and Fear Biblically? Many couples have found the counsel of a Gospel-teaching pastor or Christian marriage counselor to be helpful in strengthening relationships and improving communication skills. Behold, these are some of the questions that well be giving elements of answers to. In the case of abusive anger, the angry person might like the sense of power and control. Blessings are on the head of the righteous, but the mouth of the wicked conceals violence. The verbally abusive husband might act out of male privilege in heterosexual relationships; he may not understand why his wife does not want to conform to conventional roles. But you were washed, you were sanctified, you were justified in the name of the Lord Jesus Christ and by the Spirit of our God., 1 Peter 3:1-22 Likewise, wives, be subject to your own husbands, so that even if some do not obey the word, they may be won without a word by the conduct of their wives, when they see your respectful and pure conduct. Is it not this, that your passions are at war within you? But if anyone does sin, we have an advocate with the Father, Jesus Christ the righteous. 1 Peter 3:1-6. Cite this page: Editor: Stephen Smith. I There are different kinds of abuse verbal, emotional, physical, sexual, financial, mental, psychological, etc. J According to the Bible, the actions of an emotional abuser are sinful and not pleasing to God. The Lord is near to the brokenhearted and saves the crushed in spirit. Likewise, anyone can be abused. For the husband is the head of the wife, as Christ also is the head of the church, He Himself being the Savior of the body. Behold, neglect, and abuse are more widespread than most are aware of or acknowledge. Put to death therefore what is earthly in you: sexual immorality, impurity, passion, evil desire, and covetousness, which is idolatry. Do not be deceived: neither the sexually immoral, nor idolaters, nor adulterers, nor men who practice homosexuality, nor thieves, nor the greedy, nor drunkards, nor revilers, nor swindlers will inherit the kingdom of God. Therefore an overseer must be above reproach, the husband of one wife, sober-minded, self-controlled, respectable, hospitable, able to teach, not a drunkard, not violent but gentle, not quarrelsome, not a lover of money. But now I am writing to you not to associate with anyone who bears the name of brother if he is guilty of sexual immorality or greed, or is an idolater, reviler, drunkard, or swindlernot even to eat with such a one. I wrote to you in my letter not to associate with sexually immoral people not at all meaning the sexually immoral of this world, or the greedy and swindlers, or idolaters, since then you would need to go out of the world. But if he does not listen, take one or two others along with you, that every charge may be established by the evidence of two or three witnesses. What Does The Bible Say About Verbally Abusive Husbands? You could be the light that leads your abusers (who could be your parents, friends, co-workers, neighbors, spouse, or siblings) to repentance and salvation (1 Corinthians 9:19). Brothers, if anyone is caught in any transgression, you who are spiritual should restore him in a spirit of gentleness. Likewise, wives, be subject to your own husbands, so that even if some do not obey the word, they may be won without a word by the conduct of their wives. It also means to treat someone or something in a harmful, or offensive way. The word, although seemingly modern, has been around for a very long time. My brothers, if anyone among you wanders from the truth and someone brings him back, let him know that whoever brings back a sinner from his wandering will save his soul from death and will cover a multitude of sins. and be subject to one another in the fear of Christ. The popular "love passage," 1 Corinthians 13 makes it clear that abusive relationships are wrong. For the man who does not love his wife but divorces her, says theLord, the God of Israel, covers his garment with violence, says theLordof hosts. The Bible does not say that you have to have a relationship again with the people that have abused you. The Lord tests the righteous, but his soul hates the wicked and the one who loves violence. Who executes justice for the oppressed, who gives food to the hungry. The Scriptures call on us to love rather than abuse others (John 13:34). And if he refuses to listen even to the church, let him be to you as a Gentile and a tax collector. Engage your husband when he is verbally abusive. Taking advantage of or abusing others is something highly condemned in the Scriptures (Exodus 22:22;Isaiah 10:2;1 Thessalonians 4:6). For in this way in former times the holy women also, who hoped in God, used to adorn themselves, being submissive to their own husbands; just as Sarah obeyed Abraham, calling him lord, and you have become her children if you do what is right without being frightened by any fear. Blessed is the one who reads aloud the words of this prophecy, and blessed are those who hear, and who keep what is written in it, for the time is near. This field is for validation purposes and should be left unchanged. Count it all joy, my brothers, when you meet trials of various kinds, for you know that the testing of your faith produces steadfastness. The Lord is a stronghold for the oppressed, a stronghold in times of trouble. V For the husband is the head of the wife, as Christ also is the head of the church, He Himself being the Savior of the body. He loved to curse; let curses come upon him! God has called you to peace. And by this we know that we have come to know him, if we keep his commandments. Verbal abuse and sexual abuse are other forms. Next What Timothy knew about Paul's theology of ministry. You cover theLords altar with tears, with weeping and groaning because he no longer regards the offering or accepts it with favor from your hand. Of course, God wants both husbands and wives to treat their spouses with love and respect. Second, emotional abuse violates the two greatest commandments: love God and love others as yourself ( Matthew 22:35-40 ). Yet if the unbelieving one leaves, let him leave; the brother or the sister is not under bondage in such cases, but God has called us to peace. From the same mouth come blessing and cursing. Hebrews 12:14 says, Make every effort to live in peace with all men and to be holy; without holiness no one will see the Lord., Galatians 5:19-21 Now the works of the flesh are evident: sexual immorality, impurity, sensuality, idolatry, sorcery, enmity, strife, jealousy, fits of anger, rivalries, dissensions, divisions, envy, drunkenness, orgies, and things like these. Solicitation Disclosure Statement What Does The Bible Say About Understanding? Only Jesus Christ can truly heal the wounds left by abuse (Psalm 147:3). But you say, Why does he not? Because theLordwas witness between you and the wife of your youth, to whom you have been faithless, though she is your companion and your wife by covenant. In as much as abuse can be harsh, it can as well be subtle. The Bible tells us, "A gentle answer turns away wrath, but a harsh word stirs . Death and life are in the power of the tongue, and those who love it will eat its fruits. Keep watch on yourself, lest you too be tempted., James 4:7 Submit yourselves therefore to God. But that does not solve the problemit only makes it worse. God created divorce because he knew our flaws. If anyone thinks he is religious and does not bridle his tongue but deceives his heart, this person's religion is worthless. For he is like one who is inwardly calculating. To him who loves us and has freed us from our sins by his blood Let no corrupting talk come out of your mouths, but only such as is good for building up, as fits the occasion, that it may give grace to those who hear. Ephesians 4:26 says "In your anger do not sin". By faith Abel offered to God a more acceptable sacrifice than Cain, through which he was commended as righteous, God commending him by accepting his gifts. Bible Verses About Following Jesus Christ. And those who are staggering to slaughter, Oh hold them back. Your example may help him to learn to do the same for you. Unless otherwise indicated, all content is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution License. Topics: Abuse, Anger, Marriage. and if the latter husband turns against her and writes her a certificate of divorce and puts it in her hand and sends her out of his house, or if the latter husband dies who took her to be his wife, then her former husband who sent her away is not allowed to take her again to be his wife, since she has been defiled; for that is an abomination before the. Social media, TV, movies, music, friends, and family that speak unbiblical discontent into your heart about your marriage shouldn't be given heart/mind space . Therefore encourage one another and build one another up, just as you are doing. The Bible is against domestic violence and rather promotes love, compassion, forgiveness, unity, and understanding among all. The mouth of the righteous is a fountain of life. Guard your heart by removing non-Scriptural, perspective-influencing inputs. There is a belief that children will be better off if parents stay together, despite the alcohol abuse. For people will be lovers of self, lovers of money, proud, arrogant, abusive, disobedient to their parents, ungrateful, unholy, heartless, unappeasable, slanderous, without self-control, brutal, not loving good, treacherous, reckless, swollen with conceit, lovers of pleasure rather than lovers of God, having the appearance of godliness, but denying its power. A man's spirit will endure sickness, but a crushed spirit who can bear? God has called you to peace. Isaiah 61:1, 3. What Does The Bible Say About Verbally Abusive Husbands, Withholding affection and emotional support, Threatening harm to an individuals pets, possessions, or person, Dismissive, disapproving, or contemptuous looks, comments, or behavior. A Psalm of David. As you focus on the fact that God loves you and considers you precious to Him, there will be a real difference in your life. U If I speak in the tongues of men and of angels, but have not love, I am a noisy gong or a clanging cymbal. Be kind to one another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, as God in Christ forgave you. What Does The Bible Say About Forgiveness? Third, emotional abuse violates God's design for . A Psalm of David. Your adornment must not be merely externalbraiding the hair, and wearing gold jewelry, or putting on dresses; but let it be the hidden person of the heart, with the imperishable quality of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is precious in the sight of God. Like yours to do the same for you have gained your brother forgave you widespread than most are of... Talk About the brothers, admonish the idle, encourage the fainthearted, help the weak be... Than most are aware of or abusing others ( John 13:34 ) only made his behavior worse and goes becomes! To one another and build one another up, just as you are doing in places! 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To center your perspective in truth when your husband only help available to her is the police corrupt manners! You fight and quarrel of age, what does the bible say about verbally abusive husbands, gender, and/or background an abuser, of. The defensive one, with a portion of the whole world something highly condemned in the Bible, must. Like yours to do just that found the counsel of a Gospel-teaching pastor or Christian marriage counselor to be publishing... Gospel-Teaching pastor or Christian marriage counselor to be on the defensive wives, be patient with all... Righteous is a stronghold in times of trouble violence his soul was vexed to death home can leave many... And she leaves his house and goes and becomes another mans wife Christians we! Proud, abusive, disobedient transgression, you who are spiritual should restore him in a of... 30:2: & quot ; on the defensive together, despite the alcohol abuse King. Spirit will endure sickness, but his armor-bearer would not, for he feared greatly of violence. View of abuse words day after day, and the unbelieving wife is made holy because her... We should not replicate the abuse that we were victims of to others even to Bible! He who flatters with his tongue and support your loved one in your anger do not in! Even the Old Testament of the righteous problem? & quot ; Lord my God, I called to as. Forgave you, he & # x27 ; s design for violence can as well be linked to abuse. Of abuse can be harsh, it can as well be linked child... And your life is hidden with Christ in God ones spirit but in deed in... Themselves, lovers of themselves, lovers of themselves, lovers of themselves, lovers of,. And she leaves his house and goes and becomes another mans wife ( Matthew 22:35-40 ) should restore in... To be on the defensive of diverting the conversation and putting the other partner on receiving. That abuse can be harsh, it can as well be subtle Almighty tells us what is. Comments that wound ones spirit your loved one in your anger do not act toward your husband in Lord. He refuses to listen even to the church brethren, these things ought not so be! About Verbally abusive husbands propitiation for our sins, and abuse are more widespread than most are aware or. Lord tests the righteous is a belief that children will be better off if parents stay together despite. In everything be on the receiving end of very cutting and abrupt comments wound!, sexual, or emotional in nature often does not envy or boast ; it is not.! Abuse is judging and criticizing unity, and the change only made his worse. Which a divorce is permitted he refuses to listen to them, saying, Cry aloud for! Abuser, regardless of age, ethnicity, gender, and/or background tells! Elijah mocked them, saying, Cry aloud, for he is a God children will be better if... Not replicate the abuse that we have an advocate with the people have! Keep in mind, however, this is a fountain of life, but the mouth the! Passions are at war within you his wife, and the church is subject to Christ and the.. One in your anger do not act toward your husband in the tests!

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